February 22, 2020

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Stock Ticker

Cow Pie Bingo Coming to Flat Iron Farm

cow sign

Posted for Great Mills Trading Post
Leading Edge
By Jay Friess

cow sign

Image courtesy of Bill Bradford

Do you find that traditional bingo just doesn’t excite you anymore? Are you weary of cinder block buildings and unenthusiastic number callers?

Most importantly, do you really like cows?

Then you should definitely check out the Ridge Volunteer Rescue Squad’s first Cow Pie Bingo fundraiser at Flat Iron Farm this weekend.

The concept is simple, as described by the event’s official web site: “Pit your luck against the gastronomical actions of Bubby Knott’s cows and you could win money.”

According to the official rule set (an extensive one), Cow Pie Bingo is an event in which a 60-foot by 120-foot area of land is marked off into squares. The squares’ numbers will be randomly arranged by computer on a grid. The square numbers are then purchased by buying a raffle ticket. The number on the ticket represents the square number. There are only 3,000 tickets available.

At 1 p.m. on Oct. 13, three cows will be released into the marked area. Each cow will have a judge assigned to it.  There will also be an overall judge. Their word is law.

The first three cow pies, or “plops” in the game’s parlance, will mark the winning squares.

But, you may thinking, how will the judges account for, er, biological variances? The web site’s Frequently Asked Questions page contains the delicate answer: “If the ‘plop’ lands in two or more squares or if the cow has the walking plops, the prize money will be awarded to the square in which the greatest amount lands.”

Fascinating.

There are other contingencies to consider as well. If the animals soil an unsold square, the measurement will move one square up and clockwise to find a winner. If the cows get performance anxiety, the three winners will be selected by drawing of the tickets at random.

Tickets are $10 apiece. First place wins $3,000, second place $2,000 and third place $1,000.

There will be a car show and a petting zoo for those members of your family who cannot appreciate your penchant for bovine-based games of chance. Food will be available, but humans are not allowed to directly participate in any “bingo calling.”

Flat Iron Farm is located at 45480 Highway to Heaven Lane off Flat Iron Road in Great Mills, Maryland. For more information, visit the event web site or call 240-258-8496.

greatmillstradingpost.com

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